Sunday, December 11, 2011

Lunchtime-Elementary School style

Found these little beauties at the thrift store last week for $0.98 each and just couldn't resist. 

I used to LOVE buying my lunch in elementary school...don't get me wrong, I carried my Raggedy Ann and Charlie's Angels lunch boxes with pride...but getting to push my little green tray down the line and get my food scooped out by a big ol' scary ladie/man with a hairnet...come on - it was awesome!!!!  Who knew that these little babies came in pink?!  My very own Pinkalicious was very excited.  Maybe I can find 2 more and Mommy and Daddy can join in the fun : )

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Calgon...take me away...

As if I didn't have aenough poo-poo on my plate for the next week...hubby just found out he has to fly out of town TOMORROW morning and get back 10 hours before the girls and I leave for Florida

AAAARRRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!

Monday, December 5, 2011

It's that time of year again...

Christmas and my 19th wedding anniversary are rapdily approaching, the kids' homework levels are not letting up, I have to shop, work, bake, and pack in order to be gone for 2 weeks...didn't I just do this?!  Oh yeah...and I still need to behave and pay attention to what I eat and try to wove this old body around so I can beat my husband out of $100 on Christmas day...I am TOTALLY leaving him with 4,000 cookies before my plane takes off!  Maybe he will gain some tonage befroe he meets us in FLA : )

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Wow..just wow..

One bottle of chardonany down...by myself : )

I put up the tree, referee'd fights

Cooked a friggin turkey

and stuffing

and homemade mashed potatoes (yes, with an "e", go ahead...judge me...)

whooo friggin hooo

:)

I can still type...kind of...

later  : )

mwa ha ha...

wink, wink, nudge, nudge...say no more, say no more...

So he just left mad...

I just managed to piss my husband off and he drove away mad...I hate that  :(

I wasn't going to take the girls to a gender reveal party for his sister when they stayed up too late, woke up too early, the girls are fighting like cage fighters, his sister has an aggressive dog (towards children) that they won't control, to go drive 45 minutes and play group games (which I HATE) with people I don't know (even worse) with family members that don't even like me...it's giving me a headache

We already decided that I was going to call off...I called his sister, went to the store for yummy fresh baked cookies...and it happened...he realized he was going up on his own and was probably going to have to explain why we weren't there...B-F-D!!!!  I have to do it all the time.  He hates it and I know it, but I am tired of putting everybody else first and ME being the one that is uncomfortable...why can't someone else take a turn?!  I took the girls to a double feature at the drive in and he got to go drink around a fire with his friends and sisters.

The best part you ask...I'm staying home and cooking a turkey and pulling out all the Christmas decorations...this is a win-win for him...he doesn't have to make sure the devil dog doesn't eat our kids, he gets to drive by himself and listen to whatever he wants at whatever volume he wants and I get to stay home with 2 crabby girls and try to keep the dog off the tree AND the turkey while getting the oldest to catch up on missed schoolwork while the little ones cries about how bored she is...

This just sucks...

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Some more thrift store love!

Had a little extra time on my hands before kiddie pick up time from school, so I decided to hit my favorite thrift store and I SCORED!!!!!  I picked up one of those mail/bill organizer catch-all thingies...by Ballard Designs (can you say cha-ching?!  It's one of those stores where everyone has a pick for their pinterest page, but no one can actually afford to shop there!)..for $4.95+ tax!!!!!  Out the door for $5.38  : )  It's black and can either go downstairs in the kitchen or stay upstairs in my bedroom...gonna clean it up a bit and start filling it up!!!!

Monday, November 7, 2011

I think I can, I think I can...

On this week's schedule...

Finish the paper mache volcano project (not due until 11/14...but see line item number 2)
Get ready for camping trip and Disneyland

Yep, it's number 2 that's killing me...it involves a 400 mile road trip...ONE WAY and then hitting the happiest place on earth after two days in a tent...we are going to get a hotel in Anaheim and search out a coin laundry before we visit the mouse house...I just hope we have a great time...pics to follow....maybe we will get a few for the Awkward Vacation Photos website...one can only hope : )

Friday, November 4, 2011

I can't feel my finger tips

I have been working on a project at home for the office...it requires me to use a hot gluegun AND superglue...between the two of them I have lost most of the feeling in my fingertips...the ones that aren't glued together...

I have to glue carpet, base, VCT and paint samples to a large piece of "book-looking" cardboard that folds up nicely and represent 6 different color palettes for new tennants moving into new office spaces...been kind of using it as a life lesson for my kids...

11 year old:  Sooooo...you are pretty much gluing pieces of carpet into that book, huh?!
Me: yes
11 year old: ooookkkaayyyy (said with a slight look of uncertainty)
Me:  Make sure you go to college, ok?
11 year old:  uhh, yep (said with conviction)

I did go to college for a bit...until my scholarships ran out...the free money was the only reason I went to school in the first place..didn't know what I wanted to be (didn't want to waste the parents money)...still not really sure once you get past the "Mom" thing...I am a kind of Jack-of-all-Trades and Master of None.  I really love organizing other people and doing the crafty thing, but I never stick with anything long enough to "master" it...I burn fast, bright and then o-u-t!

One day I will figure it out : )

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

New Giveaway! New Sponsor! New Guest Blogger!

While I am all for someone getting paid for blogging (I mean who wouldn't want to get paid for their opinion?!)  but man I wish some of the blogs I follow would...oh, I don't know - Blog?!

I have found some interesting blogs by people being a guest on a blog I follow, but sometimes it seems that all there are...are guests...what happened to MY blogger?  What happened to what is going on in YOUR life?  What are YOU doing?!

My other "soap box moment" is blog sponsorship and the giveaways they propagate...I seriously think it's a new form of chain letter...if I follow these 17 steps and "Like" them in 12 different areas and leave a comment on their page and yours...I might get something for free...I'm really glad that MY blogger got something for free, wants to share AND gets paid by the sponsor...but multiple times a weeks?  Sometimes multiple times a day?  It gets to a point where it feels like your just showing off...I know I signed on to see what you are doing and what is going on in your life, but if I wanted commercials and talk show guests I would resubscribe to extended cable...

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Super Sick Kid : (

So the 5 year came home from school on Friday...it was a half day...all was good...until about 7 that night : (
She was running a slight fever, her cheeks were flushed, a slight cough and she was panting more than breathing...
Saturday ran the same way, but by Sunday night she hit a temp of 101.5 and was coughing more, so 1st thing Monday I made her an afternoon appointment with her pediatrician...poor little thing has pneumonia...just like that. No foreplay, no lingering illness, just fuzzy little lungs on her x-ray : (
She was pretty funny about the x-ray viewing...thought it looked gross but couldn't peel her eyes away and she is convinced that her doctor has no idea what a "real" heart looks like.  Needless to say, she prefers Hallmark's version to reality...kind of like her momma : )

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Thrift Store love....

Got off work  a little early and headed home, let the dog out to go potty, grabbed some library books and headed out!

Went by the library to drop off the old and pick up a new book I had "ordered", ran to the bank to deposit my check and realized I actually had time before I had to pick up the kids...took 40 bucks out of the ATM and headed for my favorite thrift store (Amvets)

I found 2 white quilted pillow shams that will complement what I have going on in my bedroom quite nicely for $4.95 (probably $50 each at the store!).
A brand new with tags Banana Republic men's sweater 1/2 off for $6.50 (BR tag was $59.99!) and this is for me, not the hubby : )
A Daisy Fuentes (Kohl's) top for me for work $4.95
A Karin Slaughter book for $1.49
and finally a little bill holder/attach to the wall thingy for out-going mail for $3.95 (had a $9.99 prcie tag on the back!)  I'm going to repurpose this one and bit and paint it black, of course...we'll see

And while I would love to post pictures of my latest treasures...my hubby has the camera in Hawaii...Yes, for those of you keeping track...he's in Hawaii...again...oh well, wha't a girl to do?  At least he was being paid time and a half on his way out there: )

Sunday, October 16, 2011

The short end of the stick...again

So...I am taking a break from the house cleaning/purge session while my hubby is off flying to Hawaii...again...for those of you keeping track, this is his 3rd time this year.  He has a butt load of work to do once he gets into work tomorrow, but come on folks...it's Hawaii!!!!  I shouldn't bitch, I mean I do live in southern California for Pete's sake...but I guess when you live in a fantastic place, you can forget how fantastic it really is...

The up side for me in all of this is that I clean/purge MUCH BETTER when the hubby isn't around.  I can walk away from a mess, surf the web, blog, read...whatever and not feel pressured to get it finished up quickly.  I am trying to get everything the way I want it and that works well for us and purging the house in the meantime for a homeless outreach project the 6th grade is participating in  : )

My sixth grader struggles in school and is having a hard time focusing at home so I am redoing her room with a less is more kind of approach.  Storing things in plan sight in the many, many boxes my mom bought her (they had the same design theme)  and storing away some of the things that she has outgrown but doesn't want to give to her sister or part with.  She hasn't been using the electronic drums, so I think I will make a slipcover type object for those.  You know how when your driving and you "just happen" to look at the odometer when it has a pattern or rolls over?  Our eyes see everything and just let our brain in on the the good and interesting stuff and I am just trying to get rid of some of the "static" in her room.  Her room looks a lot bigger and I am hoping stays cleaner longer...one can only hope...

The little one's room will be a lot more challenging and I will be working on my own personal "Sanford and Son" disaster bedroom when they are asleep...I'll pop in a dvd and start going thru the piles of crap that have been accumulating on either side of the bed...the closet and the dressing area...

Oh well, I have 6 days to get it done...gonna try for 4!!!!  Wish me luck!

Friday, October 7, 2011

Working for a living...there's a reason they call it work

I wouldn't do this shit for free and I don't call it fun.

My hat is off to all you mothers out there that work full time, go to school, do anything outside the maintenance and well being of your children.  How do you friggin' do it?!  Yes, being a stay at home mom is the most difficult job I ever had...but combining that with a 20+ hours a week job the opposite direction from home and school is going to kick my butt in a serious way.  It's a butt kicking I needed and I am hoping in the meantime the size of my actual butt will decrease from all the running around, we can actually put money in the bank and put away the plastic.  Get rid of some debt, get rid of some weight and just get my shit together.

I work extremely well under certain types of stress.  I will not have the time to put off cleaning/organizing and purging my home.  I am going to spend most of this weekend finalizing each room of the house and getting them the way I want and then that's it...dusting, vacuuming, laundry and grocery shopping only from now on. 

I have fallen into the rut of cleaning the kitchen the day after I make 3 square meals...while I'm trying to make the next days feasts...I am going to have clean as I go from now on...not going to have time to clean shit up.  I know that I am not a great self-motivator and I have been creating messes and organizational disasters in my home so that I have something to "fix"  so I can see something that I accomplished.  Unfortunately this way of life also leads me into depression and then I don't want to clean up the mess around me that I created...vicious circle that I no longer have time for...I'm going to get my pretty, clean house back and I am going to ask the gang of monkeys that live here to help me take care of it.

I am still at stay at home mom...I just have a job that pays while the kiddies are in school.

On the job front note:  They asked me to come back for 2 weeks and work as much as  I could...5 days into it I was asked if I would stay and work up to 30 hours per week and given a big ol' raise!!!!!  I said yes : )
I know my family loves me, but they don't always appreciate me.  It has been nice to know that people do appreciate me and my abilities and are willing to put their money where their mouth is : )

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Thank you Simon and Garfunkel

I am a rock
I am an island

Well this much of the song anyway...

After my "Mommy doesn't love me" fit yesterday, I had an epiphany...it was after I drank a bottle of wine...by myself : )

I may not be the first choice in everyone's life...hell, anyone's life at this point...this is not another pity party

What I AM is the one that people turn to when they need someone they can count on or are in need and I figure that I am ok with this.  You cannot build a house on sand, you need a rock, you need a strong foundation.  I AM that rock : )

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Family issues

Soooo, I have Mommy issues...
If anyone could see me, my brother and my mother in the same room, you would understand...he's the favorite.  I have spent 37 of my last 42 years with this knowledge and while it has totally SUCKED for most of my formative years, I have pretty much come to terms with it in my adulthood.  That and the fact that I moved 2,000 miles away from home helped too.

While I could take up endless amounts of time and energy giving example after example of how this is true it just simply isn't worth it.  I know it's true, my husband knows that it's true and anyone that has spent more than 10 minutes in a room with the 3 of us can usually tell too.

It's just that it seems as if my problem is becoming bigger and is now including new players : (

Now my 2 cousins (brother and sister that have a HORRIBLE father) come down to visit my parents with their kids.  And I feel like a bitch for even getting grumpy about it, their father is pretty much a monster and my parents have stepped up and are being Grandparents for their little ones, and for this I am grateful.  Here comes the but....But I don't want the play by play of everything she did for them or everything she did with them or how my cousin is going to remodel her house and wants my mom to come up and help with organizing and how my cousin will pay for her plane ticket and a spa day. 

A little side note is that I have not had a full time job in almost 12 years and we are perpetually broke.  My husband and I decided that we would rather be broke and take responsibility for screwing up our kids than to hand that over to someone else to have all the fun.  Granted we would have a shit-ton more money but this is the path we chose.  My parents pay for us to come home 2-3 times a year so they can see the kids and I truly am grateful...I go home so my kids can have a relationship with their grandparents and so I can see my folks.  And be reminded of why I don't live there anymore.  Once my youngest is in 1st grade I will be seeking employment or starting a little something/something of my own.

I also have a cousin in Texas from the other side of the family that my mother truly enjoys and compound that with the fact that this cousin is the child of her frenemy big sister and we have a match made in heaven.

My father and I have a pretty good relationship...now.  He wasn't really around when I was a kid, but it was because he was out working two jobs and partying hard on the weekend.  It was the 70's...who could blame him.  Any whoo...my dad likes to know what is going on out here so I call home everyday...yep, everyday.  But, you guessed it, I talk to my mom.  Dad is at work or asleep when I call, but he wants the update everyday.  So, while I understand that it's a daily occurrence for my mom, I would still like a little call waiting respect.  I am the one 98% of the time using up my minutes or running up my bill.  If I call and she is on the phone with a cousin, she wants to call me back...if she is on the phone with me and a cousin calls, she wants to call me back.  While part of me is a big girl and understands that I can get a call back, the other part of me wants my mommy to pick my phone call over theirs.  I swear it takes me back to being 9 years old and hearing my mom tell me to go to bed while she and my younger brother are snuggled up on the couch watching M.A.S.H. and listening my mom laugh and them talk on the other side of my wall.  It's the younger kid supposed to go to bed first?!

So, while I have a "why doesn't Mommy pay attention to me too" fit every once in a great while...I have a bigger problem.

Grand kids...

I have had some pretty big periodic fits over the years and brought up to my mom and my dad  and my brother (together and separately) how I feel about the obvious imbalance of attention and affection and my mom truly does recognize the problem and does feel really guilty.  She does try to change for a while, but she always reverts to what feels natural to her.  I can't really blame her, it's who she is.  I am a big girl and I can handle it...however my children are not big, nor will they understand.

My mother's world revolved around my oldest, in addition to me coming home with her 3 times a year, my mom would come out here twice a year...until my brother had a child...

Come on, you knew it was  coming. 

But let's go back 10 years, shall we?!  When Miss A was 13 months old I sat my mom down and had a little heart to heart talk about the way I felt growing up and that while it was not the best way to build myself worth and self esteem (they both suck by the way), it was a done deal and there was nothing to be done to go back and change it.  I am who I am and I decide who and what I become.  HOWEVER, I can control her access to my child/future children.  I told her that if her relationship with my current child (and any future children) changed AT ALL once my brother reproduced that I would cut her out of their lives.  I can't have my kids growing up wondering what they could do to have grandma love them the way she does the other kids or wonder what they did to make her not love them so much anymore.

Enter my current life...my brother has 3 little girls and when they walk in the door, my mother flips a switch and goes into "little girl" (my 2 are the "big girls") mode.  She pretty much ignores my kids and follows the little ones around like she was on a leash.  The adult part of me knows she does this because they are my brother's children and the other part is that although they live about 5 miles away, my sister in law pretty much restricts Mom's access to practically nothing.  She spends more time with my kids than his, and my brother pretty much only brings them over for more than 20 minutes at a time only when I am there.  And no this isn't in my mind, different people that have been over when the troop arrives have said that they see a definite change in her behavior and ask how my kids became so invisible so fast and wonder why all of the sudden mine can't do anything right and seem to get on Grandma's nerves when they interact with their cousins...

I know logically why things happen, but there is still this little girl inside that wants her mommy to love her and think she's special and not ditch her on the phone because something better has come along : (

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

The best laid plans...

So...I'm going to grab the tiger by it's tail and be superwoman this week...work, school, kids, house...after the barfing stops...11 year old is sick...guess I'm not going to be making any big bucks tomorrow...

Hi Ho Hi Ho it's off to work I go....

Got called back to the part time gig for a 2 week stint and I am trying to cram as much of the $$$$/hour love as I can...
Gonna try and toss the little one to the after school program since she only goes 1/2 day and they only charge $6/day (the school is really awesome and does really try to help the family budget out : )  I left out the part where they put them down for a nap...I may only get her in the one day, but I am really hoping to milk this as much as I can and then sit on my little stash...got to stay away from the clearance racks and thrift stores for a while : (

Ok, back to work : )

Saturday, September 24, 2011

So white and fluffy :0 )

My new towels!!!  I know that this is a total bonehead thing to write about, but it's going back to the small, simple things in life that can make you happy...AND if you can acheive this for 80% off IT'S EVEN BETTER!!!!

Went into Kohl's looking for a new cookie jar...

In yet another round about (and not really simpler), simple life goal I have started making all of our treats at home from scratch and the gladware on the counter was not making for a very pretty kitchen.  I am not going totally crazy or organic with the baking (yet, give me time...maybe) but I want to be able to control what kind of crap we are eating...so I figured I wouldn't cook with anything I couldn't pronounce or buy on the grocery store shelf.

Any who...I didn't find the cookie jar there, but hit the clearance part of the bath towel area and found Vera Wang big, beautiful, and super fluffy towels $22.99 marked down to $6.59 and with my 30% off coupon...I walked out the door with them for $4.61 : )
My goal here was all about starting the day off right and for about $40 (6 large bath towels and 4 hand towels) I know that when my peeps and I reach for a towel after getting all squeaky clean it won't be dingy, threadbare or have any snags or holes in it.  It will be fresh, it will be white, it will absorb water and it will smell really good...how can you have a bad day when it starts (or ends) so well?!

I may be crazy, but it's my crazy and hopefully it's a step in the right direction in better, cleaner and living with a more positive attitude.

And btw, I did find a cookie jar at Walmart for about $5  : )

Friday, September 16, 2011

Southern California has that Autumn feeling going on today!!!!

Oh yeah!!!!  My favorite time of the year!!!! FALL!!!!!

I am not completely crazy...I know that this weather won't last, but I am taking advantage of it while I can (it's kind of like a One Day Only Super Sale) I have chili doing it's thing in the crock pot and I started overhauling the back patio so we can actually sit out there and enjoy it without feeling like we are sitting in an oven!!! 

Started pruning some dead areas off the Jasmine (got it a few years ago to hide the neighbors dog pee & poo smelling back yard) pulled the dead eucalyptus leaves out of the "flower boxes" on the fence (they are plant stands I got at Target for 90% off, turned them upside down, stuffed them with the coconut stuff and attached them to the fence - ta friggin da!!!!)  Brushed all the cobwebs off the old ammo crates (I used these as shoe boxes as a kid and stacked them as part of an entertainment center in college...what can I say...my dad worked in munitions when I was growing up) and I am going to take an old shelf, paint it black and put it on the ammo crates so the girls have a place for their rock and shell collection (and we can put stuff on when we eat out there)...that's it so far...better get back out there
: )

Monday, September 12, 2011

Gettin into a groove

So the kids only went to school for 3 days last week due to the Labor Day holiday and the Southern California blackout...just when things were looking up...BAM!!!!

Oh, well...no whining! Except....(come on - you knew it was coming!)

Three friggin days into school and already the shit that is/are pre-pubescent girls has hit the fan!!!!!  Apparently a friend of my 6th grader that she has known and been friends with since Kindergarten is now giving her the brush off because the current Queen Bee does not like my daughter...did  I mention that we spent all summer with this friend and have taken/planned family vacations with and around each other...for a few years?!  Hell, once we had 9 of us staying in a one bedroom condo...AFTER spending 8 hours at Disneyland together...talk about bonding.

I feel caught between a rock and a hard place : (
I want my child to be "accepted" but I also want her to be herself and not be a lemming...
I was pretty much a social chameleon all throughout school...never fit completely into any clique, but marginally accepted by most of them...had punk friends, jock friends, band friends, stoner friends, surfer friends, nerd friends even some cheerleader friends...but I could hide in a crowd of hundreds...
The main problem here is there are only 56 sixth graders in the whole school  :(  kind of hard to seek out another social group when the pickins are so slim...

I talked to the other girl's mom and she is pretty pissed at her daughter's behavior (the issue came up in one small insident last year) and she will talk to her daughter...I'm not saying that they have to be best friends, but to kindly acknowledge someone's existance shouldn't be too much to ask...especially since you don't mind hanging out when no one else is watching...

I am very proud of the fact that my daughter is talking to us about what she is feeling and going thru (I suffered in silence) and she is the kind of child who will always stand up for what is rigth, no matter what the cost to her personally.  (She stood up for this friend at her old school in 3rd grade when the other kids were making fun of her size and clothes)  I just want her to find a friend that will stand up for her in the same way.

Little nerd children with huge hearts - UNITE!!!!!

Friday, September 9, 2011

Disaster preparedness FAIL!!!!!

Soooo yesterday afternoon as I was picking up my 6th grader ALL of the power went out in San Diego County...and parts of Orange County...and parts of Baja (Mexico)...about 5 million of us in the same boat from what I have read this morning.  Did I mention that is was 104 here yesterday?!

Well we muddle thru it in typical trailer park fashion...robbed media remote controls and cameras for AA batteries for flashlights, brought out all the partylite candles and used the radio app on my hubby's smart phone...UGH!!!!  I have been living away from my hurricane prepared self for way too long.  Although I do have to admit to a strong urge to fill the bathtub with water : )  (got to flush them toilets you know!)

So in an effort to circumvent the mass hysteria that is probably Walmart today...I am heading to IKEA for some of my supplies...shhhhh - don't tell : )

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

it's soooo on!

The hubby and I and going for our own personal version of "The Biggest Loser" and the winner gets $100 and braggin' rights...starts today and ends Christmas day...I'm soooo winning this!!!!

Saturday, September 3, 2011

An Ode to my Ex...

At first...I knew you
Then...I loved you
Then...you crushed me and left me alone with nothing (seriously - you took the fucking plates and lamps...)
ok...maybe not "nothing" but half my shit went out the door and into your truck
With no explanation
Just
"I don't love you anymore"
Then...we tried to be friends
And...it kind of worked
Then...you started dating the girlfriend of your best friend that had just died and it got kind of weird
You sent me a postcard and invited me to a birthday lunch
Our birthdays are 2 days apart
Your dead best friend's girlfriend that is now your girlfriend said she wanted to talk to me one night at a show
I did
The next night at a gig you grabbed me by the back of my head and said I was a "fucking cunt"
I spent the better part of the next decade and a half trying to figure out what was wrong with me
Always took things personally because...
Maybe "this" is why you broke up with me...maybe I shouldn't do this or that so Jim doesn't leave me too...
I never knew why I got dumped
I never knew why you stoppped loving me
I never knew what she told you
I never knew what she could have possibly told you that would make you see me that way
(Bitch I will accept with no explanation, but if you call me a cunt, please have a reason)
I wasted so much of my life and my marriage wondering if what i did or could do was wrong because I was afraid that I would do "it" again and get left alone
And then one day I figured it out
It was you, you piece of shit
Never me, always you
You never gave me a reason because there was none
I am ok
I always was ok
There is not one fucking thing wrong with me
Thank you for being the total self serving dick you were and getting out of my life so that I could find the One that I am supposed to
Be with
Love with
Grow with
Have kids with
Fight with
Cry with
Make up with
Laugh with
LIVE with


Friday, September 2, 2011

Calgon take me away...

Summer is almost over and I am not sure if I am going ot make it...

We have been in and out of the house for most of this week, which loosely tranlated means:

We come in and make a big ol' mess and don't have the time, energy or wherewithal to clean up after ourselves because we are rushing off to or resting up for the next thing.

I'm trying to make the house look less like a bad episode from "COPS" today, but am failing quite miserably...oh well - at least everyone has been fed...

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Ending the summer with a bang

This is the last week before the monkeys head off to the zoo next week and we are going out with a BANG!

Monday - YMCA complete with Activity Pool (basically a jungle gym in the middle of the pool) and huge waterslide

Tuesday - Disneyland...pretty much says it all : )

Today - Belmont Park down at Mission Beach with some cousins, it has a wooden roller coaster that was originally built in 1925 and completely refurbished in the 90's

Tomorrow - Potluck at a good freinds' "house"  it's like a friggin estate, built on 4 acres (unheard of in decently populated areas of So. Cal.) the kids can run all over by the pool, volley ball court, basketball court and we can watch them from the back patio : )

Friday - NOTHING - sorry kids, Mommy needs a break

We may end up having an extremely lazy and laid back Labor day : )

Monday, August 29, 2011

To make or not to make...the bed

Which side of this coin do your prefer?!  I flip-flop between the two...

I love the way a made up bed looks...I just hate doing it...

The stretching, the tucking, the putting on and taking off of pillow shams...thank God I ditched the idea of decorative pillows years ago...now I am just stuck with shams...and a predominately white quilt...








What the monkey was I thinking?!  I have 2 young children and a messy husband...did I mention that our room is where we spend most of our time?!  (The computer and upstairs TV are in here)  Everyone knows there is no eating in the bed and the 5 year old has brought it upon herself to show me her hands and face before she jumps up.

It's a little "girly" for my macho man's taste, but I haven't purchased a bedroom set per se in about 15 years (it took me 3 years to convince him to let me paint the furniture black!)...and it was on sale...and I had a coupon!!!!  I mean I really like what I have, but there is NO WAY I would have paid $49.99 for just one pillow sham?!  Are you kidding me?!  Again I have to  thank Kohl's for their 30% off coupons and the fact that they have sooo many things on sale...how do they make any money?!

Now's where the guilt comes in...I am a totally "Do as I say, not as I do" kind of girl here...

I had a mother who came in after me and pick up my crap, made my bed for the most part and pretty much waited on all of us hand and foot.  I did have chores as a kid like dishes (no dishwasher in the double wide) vacuuming, emptying ashtrays, waxing the floor and once I got my license I had to cart my brother around everywhere he needed to go...but I had very little experience in cleaning up after myself.  My mom would get so tired of the way my room looked, she would go in and overhaul it herself...Although there is one memorable time when I was in high school when she dumped everything and I mean EVERYTHING I owned (did I mention that I am a recovering pack-rat?!) on top of my bed and told me I could sleep on the floor until the bed was cleared off...took 3 days...this is what I had in my room
9 drawer dresser
4 drawer dresser
bedside table with 1 drawer
desk with 3 drawers and hutch
6 drawer lingerie chest in my bathroom closet (grew up in a trailer, but I had my own powder room!!!!)
and a shit-ton of stuff shoved under my bed

So, with the school year starting and me hopefully going back to some type of part time work I am expecting my girls to pick up their rooms and make their beds...guess I'm going to have to get off my ass and set the example...being a grown up sucks sometimes...

Friday, August 26, 2011

Proper Motivation

Nothing will motivate a married woman to clean her house top to bottom like a visit from her mother in law...oh yeah, then add in the fact that my mil pretty much hates me...

"Take care of Jim, take care of the girls and stay out of everyone else's life"

I think that says it all don't you?!  Pretty straight forward, no real gray area to interpret here folks. 

I'm pretty pissed that I am running around here cleaning as tho I was Mr. Clean incarnate, I really don't care what she thinks of me...but I do want the hubby to be able to breathe and not hyperventilate thinking his mom saw the house a mess...so I am cleaning, BUT I did take this little cyber-space  "me" moment : )

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Slow burn

subject removed until public annoucement so I don't get killed!!!!!!

Ok, it's official on FB, so now I can re-post this about my sister in law


So I found out last night that the extended family is going to get a little bigger, which is awesome - whose doesn't love little babies?!  Uh...apparently my mother in law...

Actually this will be a VERY interesting 33  weeks and beyond, because for YEARS my mil has been "burned out" on kids...(she has 6 of her own and used to run an in-home daycare) I am guessing that when this little bundle of joy comes along from her youngest that the tide will turn.

So how will the grandchildren that are here and their parents handle this?!

Since the blowout last October my kids haven't seen a whole lot of her...she has asked for them a half dozen of times and they do see her before and after church (even during sometimes when she is teaching Sunday School) ...but the days when I would just take them over "just because" are gone.  I don't deny her access to them, but it's up to her and the hubby to schedule play dates at her house.

It's so hard to explain (or for people to understand) that I am not bitter, nor do I hold a grudge...I just accept things and people for who and what they are and if she is a person that doesn't like me and doesn't want to spend time with my kids...why would I want to be around her?  It takes energy to hold a grudge and quite frankly, it's not worth it.  If she were just a friend or a coworker - I would drop her like a hot rock...quickly and with much force.

I just really had hoped that my kids would have a close relationship with their local grandparents.  I grew up 1,800 miles away from any grandparents and I missed out.  My husband had a great relationship with his Granny (mil's mother - go figure)...my only saving grace at this point is that my parents ARE THE BEST GRANDPARENTS EVER!!!!!  Period, no question!  My kids spend more time with my parents that are 2,00 miles away than with the ones that live 3 miles away.  My oldest is 11 and has spent the night at the mil's 4 times...and 3 of those were when I had the little one 5 years ago and was in the hospital for 3 1/2 days.  And not once since.  My poor nephew lost his other grandma when he was 3 (he is now 13) and was just recently invited over for quality time with just him...it had been 7 years since his last one on one visit.

I don't want the new baby to be ignored by any stretch of the imagination, I am just worried that the other grand kids will get even less attention then they already do  :(  Maybe this will be the catalyst that will turn her around and she will realize what she's missing.  This family is full of wonderful, awesome, beautiful children and they are growing up way too fast.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Facebook Dis

Ugh!  I find it frustrating and humorous at the same time...my husband is the only one who claims me as a relative on FB...

My sister's in law claim their other in-laws as "brothers" and "sisters"...in some cases they haven't even know these people for more than 5 years and I have known them most of their lives.
My niece claims an uncle in law, but not me (her aunt in law). I was there the day she was born AND she comes over here to swim once a week.
My mother in law "unfriended" me back in October.

It's not like I have left them out...I don't do that Family tab and they have left another in law out of the mix...as a matter of fact, his mom has the same name that I do and she is from the same hometown as me...small world...and it gets smaller...I have another brother in law whose wife's mother shares the same name as me...now if my name were popular, say I could go by some ready made stationary or a key chain with my moniker - cool...but my name is not common and I have only met 4 other people with my name and now 2 of them are in my extended family...who knew?!

I may not be claimed as family of FB, but watch out folks - there are more Paulettes in this family then there are of any of you  >: }

Monday, August 22, 2011

Face to face

In an attempt to get back to basics and cut the technology cord (a tiny bit anyway)  I set up a lunch date with the hubby and the kiddos.  Of course we did have to text back and forth a bit to get the time and place down (I didn't want to call and interrupt his work and with texting he can get me back when it works for him) 

For such a little thing, it seems like we accomplished quite a bit:
He got out of the office and all of the stress that comes with it (poor guy works IT, I think that says it all)
We got out of the house
We went to a FANTASTIC sandwich place in San Diego (I have been going there for about 15 years)
Had a great tasting, freshly made sandwich off of a real plate.
Supported a local/family owned and operated business
We spent time together as a family : )

I could get used to this, but maybe next time I will pack up a picnic and meet him at a park...otherwise I'm gonna have to get a real job : )

Sunday, August 21, 2011

$30 Bed Makeover

So this is the 11 year old's $30 bed make over...she's getting to be a big girl (I couldn't get her to get rid of the ballerina quilt she got for her 3rd birthday!) and she picked out the new comforter that was on sale and mommy had a coupon - so it only cost about $20 - thank you Kohl's! We already had the lavender jersey sheets & the lavender fleece throw, picked up the bed skirt for $5 at the thrift store (had to break up all that purple) and the round sequined pillow for $2 and my mom bought her the beaded fringe pillow about 2 years ago.  I love it when a plan comes together  :)



The lack of dollars spent on this endeavor and my time rummaging thru local thrift stores helped me ease a discomfort that has been nagging at me lately...

Who am I?

Or better yet...

What have I become?

I used to be a pessimist and have switched over to the optimist side...this I am good with  : )

The fact that I spend way to much time on the Internet and not enough time with another human in front of me is disturbing...especially because the human contact I do have is pretty much only with people that are related to me...don't get me wrong I LOVE THEM, but to steal a line from Peggy Lee...

"Is that all there is?"

I used to have a full time job, that actually paid me money, gave me benefits AND commission, I used to go out to lunch with adults and have adult conversations...now I have a network of other stay-at-home-moms that I talk to on the phone while our kids fight with their siblings in the background and we tell each other to hang on a sec.  While I am thankful for these adult conversations, most of the talk is about our kids or our husbands.

Is this all I is?!

I used to write letters and send cards to friends and family...and getting a letter or card back in the mail was like Christmas, I couldn't wait to rip open that envelope and see what was going on in my sender's life...now I have sporadic texting, unanswered emails and nonexistent blog updates. 

I used to go into local shops (even Walmart) where the checkers recognized me and commented on how big the kids have gotten...now I don't even get off my ass to go to the store unless I have checked the Internet to make sure "my store" has it in stock...I used to make things and re-purpose things I was given or treasures I found in thrift stores...hell, I even used to buy things at thrift stores and then turn around and sell them on ebay for some decent money.

I used to be a size 2, ass kicking Tae Kwon Do machine that could do anything and wasn't afraid of anyone.

The four walls that make up my house are slowly becoming my world and thanks to (or because of ) the Internet...I don't actually have to leave my home to do anything...practically anything I want can be delivered to my front door...groceries, clothes, home furnishings, medications, stuff the dog needs, etc.  It's like I've become an agoraphobic in training.  Thank God I have to actually leave the house to take the kids to school.

I have never been a fan of change. 
 I am not really self-motivated
and
I hate being told what to do...
not a good combination...

So, dear cyberspace, it looks like I am going to have to get up, find my big girl pants...actually put them on and start kicking my own ass.

I want to get back to letter writing, no Internet surfing, go out and getting my hands dirty in the yard, walk the dog, playing with my kids, I want to wear single digit clothes, I want my life back!!!  I want to go back to the trailer park where it wasn't about how big my flat screen is or if we have the latest and greatest blu-ray movie or explain why we don't have surround sound.  I want to grab a board game and not the wii remote to see if Netflix has been updated.  I want to play scrabble with my husband and piss him off using French words instead of him watching a game on the tube and the highlights on the computer while I'm reading a book on my nook.

I want the life we had before we were "blessed" by all this technology in our house...

Ok, I'm not gonna lie...I we will keep some of it...for practical reasons : ) 

I'm gonna keep my nook (hey, I don't have room for all the books on it and I get free ones from the library) and I will continue this blog...It's like a diary with spellcheck and feedback.

Let's hear it for heading back to the basics...we'll see how I do : )




Saturday, August 20, 2011

So now I'm the bad guy

How am I the bad guy when I'm not the one out until after 2 in the morning?! 

Still not home for those of you keeping track...

So between work, overtime, the new 5 day a week walking schedule, fantasy football, movies and poker with the guys...how am I not expected to turn into a shrew?!  It's like the deck is stacked againest me...

Don't know if it's him, me or everything in between   : (

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

After - Room #1

The five year old's room is now done with the purging/organizing/putting away phase : )  I am going to wait until she is in school to steam clean the carpet. 

When we put carpet in the room it was our tv room/den...we knew that it would eventually be a child's room so we put some nice, upgraded pad and cheap carpet.  I'll keep steam cleaning it for a few more years then we'll get some new stuff...probably just in time for the nail polish and cosmetics phase of her life.

Here are the "after" shots : )




My mom went crazy and bought these decorative boxes in about 9 different styles/sizes for each girl's room.  The awesome thing is - they go in either room!  so, we can switch out and add and subtract as needed as long as they keep their current color palettes  :)

One of my favorite things about this room is the comforter...look closely...the center is a baby quilt and the "border" is the matching crib bumper pad...my mom and I are an unstoppable team!!!!  My mom can sew ANYTHING.  I am serious, from baby clothes, baby quilts, sofas, sail covers, gun covers, bags to hold bullets that came out of big guns (like for a C-130) to tablecloths, drapes (she hates doing those) roman shades (swore she'd never do those again unless a grandchild asked).  You name it, she has probably done it.  She's like the Rainman of all things fabric.  The only problem is that some of her color and fabric choices are a little bit whacked out.  I can't count how many times I have come up with an idea and she has made it work.  I just have to pick out the fabrics (she once wanted to cover my sofas in the fabric equivalent of a brown paper bag, so I went out and bought a fabric with texture to it instead) and go over exactly what I want and it's like MAGIC!!!!  She's quick too...you got to keep an eye on her or she will slipcover everything in sight.

I guess it will stay this way for a little bit, it's a pretty good transition from baby girl to Kindergartner...I asked them if they wanted to paint and change up their rooms and they each said no.  This is a relief financially, but a bit of a bummer for a mommy with itchy fingers...

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

During...



So, there really isn't a "before" shot because the rooms are in constant state of disaster...so here is what the 5 year old's room looks like now...




And the 11 year old's...





It's really depressing (just look at the 5 year old...even she can't believe how messy it is)

Again I shall put on my big girl pants, go forth do the best that I can in a 10 x 10 space with no money...

Oh well, at least it keeps me out of the bars ; )

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Before and After

So this is where we were, just a tiny little bathroom with a tiny little bit of wasted space...

And now...


We are here!  Just a itty bitty shelf I bought in the bathroom section of Target about 8 years ago when we moved in...it's been in my room,  both girl's rooms and now has finally ended up where the manufacturer intended it to be.  It holds towels for just getting out of the shower AND some handtowels AND some washcloths...two baskets (one for each girl) a decorative heart shaped box for my girlie supplies, extra toilet paper, books and a tiny little heater for when it gets cold (so we don't have to turn on the furnace).

All this without bumping thighs when getting out of shower or knees when taking care of business... and the only cost $3.44 + tax for the spackle for where I took out the towel rack.

Oh, and if you noticed that my rug on the floor pretty much matches the towels on the shelf...it's because I made the rug out of bathsheets : )

Friday, July 29, 2011

So far, so good...

And so far under $5!  My $80 personal redecorating/reorganizing challenge is going pretty good. 

The small bookshelf in the bathroom is working out great and the top is a great place to store towels so it's giving me more room in the hall linen closet...which is giving me room in each of the girl's rooms because I put a few of the 1,000 quilts/blankets grandma made in there instead of their rooms and they can still get to them.  I scronged around the house for baskets and boxes and found ones that fit (both in size and color scheme).

I took out the large towel bar and I am just going to fill the holes with spackle ($3.44+tax) and a tiny touch of paint that is in the shed...it's not the EXACT color of white, but there are only 2 holes the size of Q-tips...so in true trailer park fahion I'm letting it ride : )

I actually took a "before" picture but the batteries in my camera died before I could get an after picture.  Once I find the battery charger I will take an "after" picture and a "during" picture of my oldest's room.  The small bookshelf came from her room, so I needed to reconfigure her room a tad and made her and her sister help me purge some of the surplus...Grandma sent 2 boxes from Florida that should get here on Thursday...so I need to make room for some stuff...

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

$80 Challenge

Ok, so my folks gave me some cash during my visit and I made it home with $81...the 5 year old ripped me off for a buck...but it kept her out of the bathroom while I soaked...and that was when inspiration hit...I need to make some tweaks to the house...quickly followed by the reality check that we are completely broke...

So...

I am going to take my $80, take a tour around my house and see what I can come up with : )

First on the list - upstairs bathroom

What's going to happen...move hand towel ring to adjacent wall, move regular towel rod to space over toilet, move small bookcase from bedroom to bathroom and paint walls (I'm gonna leave some holes in the walls and we never painted this room, I figure if  i get a quart I can paint this room and touch up around the house to make my $ stretch so more)  Hoping this room will cost me about 20 bucks or so, but I will be able to use the paint and spackle in other areas, everything else I already have : )

Game on!!!!

Be it ever so humble...

There really is no place like home! 

We were supposed to be gone for 22 days, it turned into 23...the lovely folks at Continental were trying to help and rerouted us with US Airways because Continental was running behind and thy knew we would miss our connecting flight...and we got stuck in the US Airways plane, on the runway, in the middle of a lightning storm, and then...missed our connecting flight...

The monkeys and I made it an adventure, pulled up our panties and started making the phone calls, reserving rooms and getting the shuttle sent over for us...the little we saw of Charlotte, NC was quite nice.

The next morning (this morning actually) we found out we had been placed in an Exit row...now normally I would be jumping up and down and high fiving strangers, but this seating arrangement does quite work out when your traelling companions are 5 and 11...had the hubby been with, he would have ditched our asses (not because he's mean, but because he's 6'4", air travel is not his friend) but we found some very happy people to trade with us.

The only real complaint I had with this airline was the food service...I know that you have to pay for what you want off the their menu and I am ok with that, but how can you run out of 2 menu items by the time you get to row 11?!  We got lucky and one of the Continental Breakfasts was hiding and he found it by the time he got to us in row 13, but come on folks...it's a 7:45 am flight - people wants their $8 bagel and cream cheese.

So, now my poor tired girls only got to see their Daddy for about 2 hours, poor man is the only IT tech at his location...AND we only saw him for a day before we left because he had been in Hawaii for 5 days.  So our little family has been apart for 28 of the last 29 days and only got a quick little visit on day 30 : (

Oh well, we are home...now for the unpacking...see you in about a week...just in time for the boxes to come from Grandma's house...

Monday, July 18, 2011

Success!

We survived the sleepover at Grandma's house!!!  My girls had a daughter of an old party friend of mine spend the night last night.  Since we had 3 girls running around, the potential of someone being left out and in tears was hanging over our heads, but never came into play...they would pair off, come together, pair off and come back together...a sweet little dance.  We opened this can of worms last year with one sleepover at Miss L's and one over here and I fear we are now doomed for all eternity...just wait until Lil's old enough to join us and the 3 local cousins figure out what they are missing...I should starting hoarding some Depends Undergarments and prozac now...I am way too old for this crap...
Now my insane self is packing up and heading to the beach : )

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Getting ready for my vacation may kill me...

The hubby is away on business...in Hawaii - AGAIN!!!!  I am trying to purge, organize, sort, donate, clean and pack BEFORE he gets back.  The dog isn't getting walked, but the kids are being fed (the dog is getting fed), having playdates and getting their pool time (3 hours yesterday with friends and cousins- kicked their butts, mine too, but who's counting?!)
I am the bizarre love child, hybrid mix of slob and organizational freak...it's not pretty, it's frustrating for everyone involved and it is getting on my last nerve.  It has me on edge, my husband pissed off, (not that he helps or anything...I know he knows where the dishes and laundry go), my kids living in a Sanfred & Son nightmare...so I have decided (after a blow up with the man befroe he left) that it ends now...whatever isn't put away, donated or sorted...will be thrown out before he gets home...
So, that being said...MY walk-in closet is done, the dressing area between our closets is done, upper landing - done and my craft closet downstairs DONE!  I did feed the kids a meal that I actually made myself, with groceries we went to the store to get...I have 48 hours left to finish this bitch...time to get back to it!

Monday, June 27, 2011

Deja vu...I.C.U.

Dad is in the hospital again...ICU, chest pains that were at an 8 (his "4" would cause me to pass out) that nitro couldn't bring down, waiting for results of echocardiogram and nuclear stress test...all initial tests came back pretty okay, but he is still showing signs of a clot somewhere...checking his lungs today...mom isn't sure if they are doing this via x-ray or dye...hope it's not dye because he has stage 4 renal failure and getting the dye in and out of him is hard on his body already...

SUCKS being so far away...we are headed that way in a week, hopefully he is out and on his way to recovery...he is always like this boomerang or yo-yo that always comes back to you or diligently back up the string...I'm just afraid that one time he will just keep going...

I try to be hopeful, with a little bit of reality thrown in...he is a very sick man and has been for a long time...it's just really hard to see it when you are in his presence...you can't see scars, the missing parts of lung, the artifical arteries, the shunts, the stints, the cancers, the failing kidneys, the deteriorating bones, the blockages, the vascular disease, the heart disease...

All I can do is sit by the phone wait for the updates and pray...

Friday, June 17, 2011

One more week - then SCHOOL'S OUT!!!!!

Three more days for the little one and 4 days for the biggin'. then we are done until September!!! The girls will be actually going to the SAME school and it's starting 3 weeks late due to construction schedule!  Yes, I would like someone else to entertain them starting mid-August, but I am not eager to start waking up and putting a bra on before 7:30 am and putting shit tons of mileage on my car. 

We will be totally BROKE and I will be constantly trying to pry my kids off each other and breaking up fights, but I am ready!  Guess we will just be trading pool time with Miss J and her monkeys as much as we can...of course our vacations are runnign back to back, so we will start and finish the summer with really good friends : )

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Take a bite...you know you wanna...

I want to eat EVERYTHING!!!!!  It must be because I will be going on vacation soon...to Florida...don't hate, it's hotter than hell, humid AND I will be living with my parents again.  I must be a special kind of idiot, not that I don't love my family....I really do, it's just that I don't ever feel like it's a vacation...more of a family trip, except the hubby gets to stay at home...alone...oh, and possibly head back to Hawaii for work!  Ugh!!!  I wanna trade...he can travel alone with the kids, make dinner for my parents (my mom does do the shopping and the dishes tho!)  And somehow, I have ended up with the "honey do" list.  Boo friggin hoo.

ok, enough of the pity party, someone take the 5 layer dip away!  I swear with all of the end of year school crap between the 2 kids, vocal practices and performances, wrapping up work and general life doo doo, I feel like 24/7 PMS bitch and stuff my face machine.  Maybe I'll just switch to beer : )

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

So...he's asleep on MY side of the bed...

And I am totally hoping that my typing this wakes him up and he moves...
waiting...
waiting...
I got nothing  :(
Could wake him up...already tried...
He did take the 5 year old to the pool while I took the 11 year old to dress rehersal, and he gave her a bath BEFORE I got home...
I guess I will grab my nook and head downstairs and read for a bit...then all bets are off }: /

Thursday, June 2, 2011

School is almost out!!!

My girls still have almost 3 weeks of school left...I may be wearing adult diapers by the time all is said and done, but at least it will be over...for a while...at least when it starts up again, they will be attending the same school!

In the meantime I have been getting off my big ol' butt, being more active, eating healthier food and cleaning/organizing/purging my house with renewed vigor!  I have already been to the thirft store twice this week with donations - I actually scored an AWESOME pbk bed skirt for the 5 year old.  It is white with a Swiss Dot pattern, has a pale pink ribbon running thru the bottom about 2 inches up from the edge and has scalloped lace at the hem - for $4!!!!  I saw one online that wasn't even as pretty for about $89 - me likey : )
The 5 year old wasn't happy that her sister got a new pillow pet (she used her own money) and she got a bed skirt, oh well...not going to be the last time something like that happens.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Should I tell him?

It's not nearly at cryptic as it sounds...

One of my relatives has started a blog...he has linked it on his fb page, I have read it, it's quite good, he says it's theraputic and I agree...so now for my question...


do I tell him that I have one too? 

 I'm not linked to any social networks and no one on the hubby's side of the family really knows that my little slice of cyberspace exists, or if they know I have a blog, they don't know where to find me (mwa ha ha).  I don't care if they find me or if they read it...I just don't want to be the one giving them directions...the main reason I started this blog was to purge myself of the juju that has become my relationship with my mil...not like I rant and rave about her but because of what has happened I no longer have family members to talk to about life stuff anymore...

So that is where you all come in...friends, followers, stalkers, passersby...everyone!  I don't have to worry about anyone running and telling their mommy some completely eff'ed up version of what I really said...


Seriously people - how does "What's going on?"  turn into "What is she doing here?" It just doesn't make for the Disney ending when shit like this happens, no one says anything to me...like WTH? Why did you say that?  Then I could say - "Um, I didn't"  But, noooooo they hold the stuff in, let it boil and spill out years later.

It's like some folks have been taking little doses of poison and hoping that I would fall over and croak...Sorry to disappoint you - ain't gonna happen.  Not only am I not going to roll over and play dead, I flat out REFUSE to take ANY responsiblity for ANYTHING not brought to my attention and discussed.  Ask me, accuse me, point a finger, but at least give ME the chance to confirm, deny or salute you with whatever hand gesture I find fits the situation.  Don't come up and tell me that I have offended you over the years, give me no examples and then expect me to apologize...I won't.  Not because I don't feel like I have to, but because I don't believe you.  Not that I can't be offensive...trust me I can...the point is I almost never intend to (at least to to friends and family...to a-holes that spill beer on me or cut me off on the freeway - YES!) be offensive, and if it is brought to my atttention, I can and will apologize.  But the main issues at hand here on Walton Mountain are based on straight up lies...hell, I wish I had been able to see my face when my hubby told me what it was I supposedly said ...my mom and aunt who saw me after the news thought that someone had died.

Damn...that kind of came out of now where...kind of pisses me off that this stuff still bothers me...but I shall continue on with my cyberpurging and hopefully be less and less juju effected as time goes on

xo

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Shhhh...don't tell the kids

We are planning a surprise trip to Disneyland!!!!  Only for a day, but...uhmmm - it's Disneyland!!!
We bought annual passes when my cousin came visisting from PA with her twins (we would have needed to take the hubby with us and gone in october...so why not?!  Costs about the same and we can run up there if we get bored one day)...and one of my kids got sick, we couldn't go and we haven't activated the passes yet...
On the day of my hubby is going to hand them their Mickey ears and tell them to put them on and get in the car!!!

Can't wait to see their faces...

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Baby Steps

The house is slowly getting put together...surprised that I got anything done at all...did I mention that the hubby ran off to Disneyland with a friend and left me with the kids, the dog and the messy house?!  It's not as bad as it sounds...he's helping out a friend that doesn't drive and can't get there on his own (he has a few issues) so he paid for gas, hotel and entry to the park...but it was not really helping me get my motivation on...

Hopefully I can make some more progress today (like walk into my walk-in closet), may even take some pictures and put together a slideshow for my dad to check out when I go home this summer.  He HATES California (he did actually live out here for a bit in the late 80's- and had to spend a lot of time driving to and from L.A., so his issues are a little legit) and can't really travel...so he's never seen our place or any of the projects he's helped me with long distance.

Or...I may just sit on my butt and read...

Saturday, May 21, 2011

The magic in the bedroom

Turn off your dirty little minds...THAT kind of magic is already taken care of ; )
I'm needing some extra help to get this clean/organizing feat off the ground and running, so of course I'm blogging...
Ok, so I have more than a slight problem getting stuff done around here, so today I am going with guilt motivation instead of the embarassment motivation tactic used yesterday...let's see how long it take me to blog in the results - start the clock....NOW!

Friday, May 20, 2011

"After"

ok, so I found a little embarassment driven motivation...upsatirs landing is clean...really clean, actually put away in it's place and vacuumed...no way I'm trying this with my bedroom tho...

MISSING: My Motivation, if found, please call...

Ugh!  School is going to be out soon, my part time job is going to disappear, I have no prospects for new supplemental income on the horizon, my house looks like a bad indoor version of Sanford and Son and all I want to do is go to the library and pick up the book I ordered and read all weekend....not good...

I was actually thinking about posting a picture of how bad upstairs looks, in the hopes that the embarassment would drive me to actually do something about it...of course that would mean getting up and grabbing the camera...then posting, then actually cleaning, new picture...new post....WHERE's that book I ordered?!  I'm tired already : (

I am actually a total slob at heart that is only capable of organizing other people and a HORRIBLE example for my children!!!!!  My mom used to let the house go for a month or 2, then kick us all out and go on a mad tear and sterilize the place in 2 days (1,900 sf double-wide - not an easy task)  My main problem is I can't get the family to leave....this is my story excuse and I am sticking to it...I have the ADD so bad that I get distracted and clean the WHOLE friggin house at the same time...the place looks like a dump for a day and a half and in the last hour every single room completes its transformation, happens like little dominoes.

Screw it...gonna take a before pic of the upstairs landing....maybe...

UGH!!!!
so here it is -
you can't even see the cute little bench I got at the thrift store for $7.50 and my mommy made a cushion for it when she was here with repurposed foam and my 80% off fabric
The whole thing
(minus the labor)
$10.00!!!!



ok, gotta get off my fat butt and get to work so I can post my "after" shot....
see you in a week ; )

Monday, May 16, 2011

Just a Quickie...

My house has become a disaster...kind of reminds me of an episode of cops...clothes piled everywhere, toys laying where they fell, WAY too many dirty dishes in the kitchen, and the only proof of a dining room table is that you can actually see the legs that are holding up all that crap...the only thing we are missing is the actual mobile home at this point.
So, in an effort to rememdy this situation, find some stuff that has been missing for a few days and keep my husband's head from blowing straight off his shoulders...I took the morning off from my little (but completely awesome) part time job and I am going to knock out what I can before I pick up Miss C in 3 hours
Maybe I should stop blogging and get cleaning?  Don't really want to but I'm going to put on my big girl pants and go knock this B&$^@ out!

Monday, May 9, 2011

Ready for my vacation

I am soooo ready to head back east for a bit...ok, it's more than a bit, but I am staying with my parents so it's kind of like a working vacation.  They pay for me to bring the kiddies out to see them so Grandpa doesn't have to suffer the evil that he feels IS California(+he can't fly due to health reasons) and my kids (and myself) get to get spoiled a bit. {It's pretty sad that my kids see my parents on the other side of the continent more than their Grandma that lives 3 miles up the street...oh well - her loss!}  I end up working my butt off cleaning out cars, tackling project Mom puts off (waiting for me) and cooking just about every night...but it's with my family and I want to make sure they know how much I appreciate them and everything they do for us.  Trust me, being a mostly stay at home mom (I work outside the home about 12 hours a week) and living just outside San Diego...there's no way for a Florida vacation without some help or me going back to work full-time.  The kids would probably like daycare more than me helf the time, but their mine and I'll screw them up myself thank you very much ; )

Monday, May 2, 2011

Freedom of speech...unless you don't agree with me? WTH?!

So an old party friend from back in the day...you know like a million years ago in P'cola, FL in the club 2001 era (sigh...) posted a comment today on FB..
".if you don't like this post please tell me so i can delete you!"  it then states his opinion about Osama Bin Laden death...which he is entitled to...duh - AMERICA !
Mr. C is very liberal, very gay (married to his husband for 13 years I believe) and very pagan (wiccan last I knew)
I am very republican, hetero and Christian...yet I wouldn't even dream of deleting him for his opinion.  He was and is a very special part of my life regardless of his opinions...in fact maybe because of them.  Every self respecting 90's night-clubbing girl needed their best gay boyfriend - again - DUH! 
My conservativeness doesn't define who I am any more than my favorite color does.  It's a part of the whole...we are all complex creatures with infinitely many things deciding who we are and how we act...I embrace all things, not just the "big" ones...I am not big on labels...on wearing them or dishing them out.
I was actually unfriended by my very outspoken democratic brother in law (poor boy lives in Hollywood...he can't help it - lol!) until I pointed out to him that he was doing the very thing he was acusing me of - censoring him...why delete me because I am conservative?  I do find it more than a bit funny that some of the very people screaming to be heard would try to silence the voices that don't agree with them.
I don't usually get on my soap box often, if this can be even considered getting on one...but my feelings were hurt : (
I want to be free to be me too...

I got nothing....

Been working my butt off (and for those of you that actually have full time jobs...especially when you have kids - my hat is off to you!!!!)  14 hours doesn't seem like a lot (especially to my paycheck), but when I put that on top of kids, school (2 going to school in 2 different cities - thank you CA freeway system and my super good friend J, without you I couldn't do it!), homework, Girl Scouts, school performances, singing lessons, dog puke on carpet (smooshed in by 5 year old) blah, friggin blah, blah, friggin blah!

Okay, done whining (for now...just being realistic) 

But I did feel great when my hubby told me that his brother was telling him how much work he does with his 2 kids (they just added a baby recently) with feeding them taking one to school, cooking dinner, etc...I just sat there basking in the glow that is my messy house and smiled.  Told my man that our house may be on the messy side, but to consider himself lucky, because he doens't have to do shit around here.  He started to object, but when I pointed out that he couldn't list 5 things that he does around here on a consistent basis, he went back to his computer screen  : )

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Hey Mom...where's my stuff?!

I was taking a bit of time today, exploring some different blogs and DIY thingys and while dreaming and sighing and wishing that some of these places could be mine...I started looking closer...

Where is all their stuff?!

I mean, really - where's the stuff?  Toys, laundry, homework, the children, groceries - anything other than the Martha Stewart, Better Homes and Garden layout I'm currently viewing.  I'm all for cleaning up the place before you take a picture (this is why I don't have any "before" pictures...there's a reason I'm changing/getting rid of the stuff!) but is there like a mountain high pile of shit tettering behind you ready to snuff you out if it falls?
I know that some people have more than the 1,323 sf I am currently sporting, but come on...let your kids have some stuff..any stuff?!  I hold myself back in my quest/obsession with taking over (organizing!) my girl's room...as long as there are clean and neat and nothing is growing in there - it's ok...so their art, Lalaloopsy posters, puzzles glued together and pictures of friends dogs are all up on the walls.  At first it made me crazy...where was the theme?  Where was the balance?  the symmetry? 

Then I realized...I have my own room and now I embrace theirs and their own little spaces : )

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Happy Easter!

Well, it's Easter, a time of miracles and this year is no exception...my mil actually called my son and invited us over for Easter!  Crazy, but true.  She even invited me, and said that she understood if I didn't want to come...sounds like someone maybe growing up a little bit : )
I won't be going...it's not about forgiveness or holding a grudge...it's about my self respect and me staying away from someone who hates me...if she was a co-worker or friend I would cut her out of my life so fast her head would spin, my true friends and family would kick my a$$ if I ever talked to her again...but this is my mil, so I am kind of stuck with her...I am polite when I see her, give her access to my children, but why should she get a "get out of jail free" card just because of her position when I would cut any other b^&$%# that treated me this way?  Something to think about, but in the meantime, my dog will get a good walk in and I will clean my house!

xo

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

I'm baaaaaaacccckkkk!

Damn - it's been a while!

And as I am typing this it feels like the whole world is rocking....not becasue I am hung over (I Wish!) but because the family, some friends and some drop in guest and I have been flosting in a cabin on a lake since monday afternoon.  Flipping LOVED IT!!!!  Need to get rid of my sealegs...

Here it is:
Bathroom model 98% complete....but in fixin bathroom - we blew out our computer : (
It's back up and running, but need to get old hard drive stuff onto our shiny new hard drive.
My dad had some medical issues the day befroe my mom was to fly out...he did ok, she is here, but my dad's mom died yesterday afternoon : (
So now I havjet o keep Mom busy until her flight Friday and then find a way to get me to Pennsylvania after my hubby just killed a decent amount of vacay : (

That's the cliff notes version....film at 11

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Poor sick baby girl...

My youngest is sick...again...poor baby, she doesn't want to miss her Easter Egg Hunt at EAK tomorrow...gonna have to break it to her gently, she has a fever of 102...she ain't going anywhere tomorrow...She just fell asleep on my bedroom floor after eating some chicken soup...I would take a picture and post, but it's just too damn pathetic : (  She said she was too tired to get on the bed...just wanted a pillow and a quilt...okay...maybe just one pic...ugh - just can't do it - afraid the flash will wake her up : (

Monday, April 4, 2011

Holidays....a time for family....

Or not : (

Just got an email from a brother in law talking about Easter/Birthday celebration at a local lake...in this email it says that there is also going to be a late lunch/early dinner at their mom's house...again WE have not been invited to his mom's house!

Feel like packing my shit and moving back across the U.S of A. I personally don't ever want to set foot in her house again, but how do you explain to your kids that they can't go to Grandma's house because she isn't talking to Daddy, hates Mommy and we weren't invited?!  Fuckin A folks - at lease ask if the kids can come over !!!!!!!

Guess we will have to change churches now....this is getting to be too much : (

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Getting closer!!!!

Downstairs Bathroom Remodel update:
The Vanity top is installed and I installed the backsplash and sidesplashes (is that really a word?  well, they go on either side of the sink....) and caulked everybody in all snug.  I have also painted the lower cabinet with the new wall color (Behr - Haze...a pretty beige) and the cabinet doors bright white.  Also, repainted the medicine cabinet bright white.  I started installing the faucet stuff to the new sink, but need some supervision and waiting till the hubby gets home.  Also, going to ply him with his choice of dinner to get him to change out the light fixture and put in a new outlet that is actually white.  I'm  more than a little afraid to deal with electricity.  Then all I will have to do is sand, paint and re-install the door moulding I removed and we will be good to go!  I really like the way this little sucker is headed....sometimes I just go in there and sit and stare at everything : )

Also bought some new lamps at Lowe's today and going to attack my bedroom...got 2 table lamps, 1 floor lamp and one accent lamp in satin nickel finish for $80...they came with white tulip shaped shades AND the light bulbs...not bad!

Gotta get all this $^*@ done before my mom gets out here on the 15th.  Shhhh...it's a secret, we are surprising the girls :o)

Thursday, March 31, 2011

My Life as a Chameleon

It's the weirdest thing...
I don't fit in...
anywhere.

I can adapt to my surroundings, carry on reasonably intelligent conversations with different folks, with different backgrounds...
In junior high and high school, I was friends with jocks, punks, band geeks, regular geeks, cheerleaders, stoners, brainiacs, I think I about covered all of the cliques...but never had one of my own...
I lived on the other side of town in our double-wide...the kids in my neighborhood went to the junior high and high school a mile and a half up the street and I got to ride the big yellow bus...
I took Tae kwon do after school and because of my height, I took the adult classes, so I became everyones little sister...ok to hang out with in class, but never got to go have fun afterwards...sometimes i did the annoying little sister thing and got to tag along, but not often
In college I hung out in the "alternative" club scene and it was great - I never felt so alive or so welcomed...until everyone found out I wasn't bi and didn't do any drugs...still they let me hang out on the fringes (because I DID drink like a fish and smoke like a chimney and LOVED to dance and go to local live shows.)
Then I fell in love and packed up my shit and headed to Cal-i-forn-i-a!  Went from being a kind of big fish in a little pond (hey, you go out 6 out of 7 nights a week and you get to be like Norm on Cheers!) to living outside of a city with a population of 1.3 million...I'll just keep my self and my attitude at home thank you...
Thought I fit in pretty good with his family (not really the case...see previous posts), we got married, goofed off for a number of years...had a kid...bought a townehouse...had another kid...
I'm too old to really fit in to the current stay at home mommy crowd, although I do have some "friends", I have some friends at church, but we mostly just talk on the phone and say "hi" at church...I work with a great bunch of ladies, but it's just work...
I feel like everybody's plan B...the girl to go to when no one else is availalbe...I'm good for a laugh and an inapprpriate comment or two (let's face it, it's more like 112) this even applies to the hubby...don't get too upset with him, it's a situation I helped create...he likes crowds and action and I am a homebody...

Maybe my mom should have tied a pork chop around my neck...then i would have at least had the dog...

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Not the happiest place on earth....

So, I'm supposed to be at Disneyland right now...a surprise trip for the kiddies to go up and meet their 2nd cousins visiting from Pennsylvania...and wouldn't you know, my 11 year old comes down with the stomach flu at 11:00 last night - SURPRISE!!!!!

Flipping stinks!  Thank God I didn't tell them the plans, I don't think we would have survived the fallout from the disappointment.  My cousin does have 2-day hopper tickets, so we might try again tomorrow...but it isn't really a good day for it...

The best laid plans...go to waste - ugh!!!!

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

If it doesn't kill me, I'll get stronger ...right?!

Well, I should have Superman like stretgth by this point....

The bathroom remodel is coming along slowly, but surely...and now I have a major issue in the living room...

Made 2 - 8" round cakes for my hubby's birthday...then make a batch of buttercream frosting, divided it in half so each of the girls could decorate their our cake...and then we went on our merry way...yes, I forgot to clean up after us and...the dog reached up onto the counter and grabbed the green food coloring and went to his favorite chew it up spot...can you guess where that is?!

Under the stairs in the living room...can you guess what happened?!  Can you guess what color my carpet is now?  My light tan 50 oz, cushy carpet now has green spots!!!!!  I googled some solutions on line and came up with one and now the spots are lighter, with a lighter color of tan around them...so I either bleached out spots on my carpet or my carpet was a lot dirtier than i thought.  While I am hoping for the latter...it is going to require applying the solution to my entire living room.  I am going to do it with my little green machine, which may kill it, but it beats replacing the carpet...maybe I should just replace the dog?!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Distance can make the heart grow fonder...

AND drive you totally batshit when one of your parents is sick!!!!!

I sit here in not too sunny California while my dad sits in ICU in sometimes sunny Florida (who nicknamed it the sunshine state btw?  No one who actually lived there - geesh!)

I know he's getting the best care and he really likes the hospital and the doctors, but it just sucks being this far away....actually if I was there it would be hard to see him because he is in a militray hospital.  He is actually a bit of a legend there...no one knows why or how (even with all their cool stuff and meds) that he is actually alive.  He is actually pretty proactive in is health management too...(not that his health problems will make him put down the cigarettes (Malboro Lights) or the Bud Light...but he did move on from Menthols and Bourbon...baby steps folks)  He carries around this 3" binder with all his latest lab results,  PET scans, ultrasounds, current meds, previous meds, why he doens't take previous meds, 3 times a day blood pressure readings, doctors names and numbers (same with the specialists) so that once he is in ER they can hit it, get it and go...they all know him as "the guy with the book".  That and every Christmas Eve he and my mom (or he, me and my girls or just he and I) go down to the hospital and give every floor some homemade Christmas cookies and goodies.  He likes to take care of people that take care of him and when you have heart diesase, vascular disease, lung cancer, lung removal, 50% lung capacity, 30% kidney function, skin cancer, an anyorism (sp?), elevated PSA issues, osteoprosis, and these are just the big ones (he looks like frankenstein with his shirt off due to so many bypasses and such)...you take care of people and have your shit together when you walk in the door.
Ok, gotta go take my mind of this and go scrub something!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

sooo close, I can almost taste it....

and I can definitely SMELL it!  I found a Rustoleum product that is a 2 part epoxy paint to help rescue the FAIL that has been our attempt at bathroom remodeling...I guess there is a reason we were renters for so long...
The fake "cocoa" colored cultured marble is now white and STINKS!!!!  It totally has that trailer park feel that is so much a part of my life (i.e. - it has some bumps and what I do believe is hummingbird poop imbedded in the final product)  Oh well, it ain't pretty, but it's mine and now we will be able to get a buzz while we are taking care of nature's basic needs.  It can't be exposed to water for three days (and you are supposed to use this to refinish a bathtub...duh-winning!) so we can't start putting the sucker back together until Monday afternoon...I think I will start the process and glue the vanity top down, so that even if the hubby hates it - he'll be kind of stuck with it ; )

Depending on what the outlook is and whether or not I can get a picture off without actually being in it - I might post one or two of the finished...we'll see, it will probably take us a year to get it finished...but my mom will be here in three weeks, so I am sure that will light a fire up under my man's undercarraige!

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Time to re-up the Prozac Rx

Maybe I am in the middle of some mid-life crisis or maybe it's just that too many "big" things are happening so close together or maybe I have too much of a tough outer shell and no one realizes that I am mushy on the inside...and why is it when I show any kind of weakness (a.k.a - natural human responses to juju-like stimuli) the wheels start to fall off everyone else's bus?! 

This is why I act so tough and self-sufficient (sp?) all the time!  I flippin have to!!!!!  I get to the end of my rope...tell people that I am at the end of my rope and they just go on their merry way...then when the shit hits the fan and I hit the Prozac AND the Marlboro Menthol Light 100's and run around in tears - they get grumpy?!  I'm sorry, did I miss something here?! 

I try to keep my problems and girlie feelings to myself (I know this is wrong), but I don't want to add to anyone else's problem (again, I know - wrong) and now that I don't really trust too many people in my extended family, I have lost some of the folks I used to be able to vent to...

Thank you cyberspace for the outlet for bitchin and whining you have given me and thanks to those who stop by to check on me/listen to me/drive slowly by my curent wreck...

Ugh!  Gonna head downstairs and build/paint/repurpose something, because those blogs are much mo better than these ones lately.

No more bitchin' and whining for today (tomorrow? maybe) and figuring out what I need and how to get it so I can feel better and get "me" back.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

And the hits keep coming

Just when I think my mother in law is finished being a total biatch...she steps it up a notch...

Apparently there was a lovely gathering this weekend at her home with all six of her children and their significant others...oh wait, Ms Iz wasn't there because she just had a baby a bit ago...and oh yeah - we weren't invited...

WHATEVER!!!!!

I don't really care what she thinks about me, really I don't - I couldn't possibly make everyone happy all the time and I refuse to change who I am to fit into anyone's plans...if I'm not going to change who I am for my husband, why the hell should I change for her?!

What do I care about?  The way she ignores my husband and that my kids are missing out being with their cousins as a group.  We have always hung out with everyone on our own, but they are missing the drama dogpile that is family BBQ with everyone...
Also, the hubby didn't even do anything...and I do mean ANYTHING!  She yelled at me and stopped talking to him...doesn't even make eye contact with him at church...that's right you heard me AT CHURCH....no wonder so many people out there in the world think that Christians are hypocratic losers - yikes!  Not saying that I am the poster child for Christianity, but I can turn the other cheek when needed, I don't preach at others (at all, really) and just try to treat others the way I want to be treated. 
So much of who I am boils down to respect...respect who I am and what I am doing (whether you agree with it or not) and I will do the same for you.  Disrepect me and "Bye - bye".  Life is too short and way too complicated these days for me to deal with people that can't even follow the most basic of Kindergarten rules.
Whew, I may not feel any better really, but it nice to take an emotional dump out here in cyberspace...